Ok, Ok, Ok I know what you all are probably thinking.  You can’t be positive all the time. Or can’t we just be ok with things being bad sometimes? Or the last thing anyone needs is someone preaching to them to slap a smile on their face and fake happiness.  This isn’t really what I’m talking about.

First and always, I want everyone to embrace any feeling that they are having and allow themselves time to sit in the feeling for a bit.  This is not about denying the having of a feeling.  But what happens is those uncomfortable feelings–side note: I do not call them bad feelings because there is nothing bad about them, they are nothing to be ashamed of, they are just not usually fun to have and others often don’t know how to handle it when you have them–the uncomfortable feelings take over our entire self and become in control.  Lets think about this, would you ever want any feeling to be in complete control over you all the time?  That lack of balance creates an intensely unhealthy mental state.  So back to uncomfortable feelings–anxiety, sadness, anger, jealousy–I’m sure we could go on here.  But to have them and acknowledge them is ok, but there comes a point when you need to walk away from that feeling and move towards positivity.  I wish I could give you a very specific time frame but I can’t.  Your body, lifestyle, friends, co-workers, and responsibilities will give you clues when it is time.

When it is time, you really have to work hard and at not letting the uncomfortable feeling consume your total thought process.  There has been scientific evidence that faking a smile will release “feel good” chemicals in the brain therefore making you feel happier but thats not really what we are talking about here.  This is good old fashion looking for the rainbow in the storm, looking on the bright side of life, seeing the good in things.  You and everyone, yes I really believe this, can think and talk themselves into feeling something different.  I’m not saying it will be quick, easy, or even a drastic change but it WILL BE improvement.

Example:  Myself, I have been dealing with some medical stuff that has been so life changing that initially I was not in a happy place.  Uncomfortable feelings galore..angry, frustrated, sad, (well devastated) hopeless, etc… I could have stayed there for a very long time.  It actually would have been very easy; many of my little freedoms were removed, and I was not able to get up and move much.  I spent my time having my feelings, probably a little bigger, louder, and more openly than the people who were around me were comfort with.  But had them I did!  Then one day scrolling through a support group Facebook page I stubbled upon someone who has gotten to the right doctor, the one we are all on the waitlist for, and was feeling so much better she was able to returned to exercising.  That was the moment I realized there was hope, I will Zumba again, it may be a little different but I will wear those crazy clothes again.  I will be able to get on the floor hour after hour and have play therapy sessions eventually.  The change in my thinking was gradual but there.  Every day was one day less on the waiting list.  Each day I found my victory big or small.  I am embracing my progress as opposed to crying while watching Zumba videos teaching choreography that I can’t do.  I am finding small things I can do as opposed to verbally spouting about everything I can’t do anymore.  I am not allowed to drive people!  Which as a mother of 3 with activities is crazy frustrating, but now I am enjoying the adult company I have in the car to and from events.

You can do this on big and small levels.  You can change your whole life and demeanor by changing to more positive thinking daily.

Anxiety – Instead of feeling overwhelmed and worried about the day, break the day down in pieces that you know you can be successful completing, and enjoy checking them off your list.

Depression – Set a new thing to overcome everyday, even if its starting by getting out of bed.  Do that and be proud of yourself for doing it.  Hey, at least I can get out of bed today.

Trauma – Wow I was just triggered, I may not have handled it well but at least I understand it’s a trigger now.

There is always a better way to look at things.  You may not be good at this at first, you may need to use a journal to brainstorm, a friend, a therapist, or support group to help you see the positive.  It will become a habit and like any habit it comes easier in time.

You can choose if you want to spread your thought changing or if you want to silently dwell in your change, but people are likely to notice and you will feel so much more balanced mentally.  Balance is always the goal, hard to achieve and hard to maintain, but now you know how!

Remember, first have and feel the uncomfortable feeling, then take the time to change your thinking!

If you have questions feel free to reach out to me, if you need help doing this, I am here.  Ask yourself today, am I see the positive?

Here’s to achieving more balance!

Peace